What is your premise when you interact with someone ? Believe it or not, but starting premise often drives the outcome – whether it’s about working in a team or as simple matter as having food in nice restaurant.
Premise is often driven by state of the mind and/or your beliefs.
Suppose you are visiting a restaurant. Waiter brings you a delicious soup for starters. Unfortunately, the moment you have the first sip, you do not like the taste. Obviously, you are pissed off and need to vent out your frustration. You call up the waiter and scold him for shabby taste.
Step back for a moment.
Is waiter directly responsible for shabby taste of the soup ? He is not. The Chef is.
Thats where Premise comes into play. The moment you decide that whole world is working against you, you are all set for a war. You shoot the first person you see. Collaboration goes out of the door and absurdity steps in.
Solution becomes difficult to achieve in such a scenario. You do not realize that you are the one who caused it. But you blame the whole world for it, thus your starting premise becomes self fulling prophecy.
Why it would be difficult for people to politely call the Chef and ask for replacement ?
He would be happy to give it on the house. Try it.
(Same thing works for your career or life for that matter.)